GypsyNester.com's
Top 10 Ways to Scare Your Boomerang Kid Out of the House
10. Greet him at the door naked with a bottle of Viagra and a can of whipped cream and shout "Honey, I guess we can't use the kitchen, our baby's home."
9. Set his computer so all his porn and poker sites go to GoArmy.com.
8. Invite your friends over to have a party in his room, trash it and smoke all of his dope.
7. Buy him a chauffeur's hat and start calling him "Jeeves".
6. Hack into his My Space page and change his profile picture to a slug.
5. Say "I'm glad to have you home but I'm afraid dad might miss using your bed for 'our quickies' ".
4. Throw a bridal shower for his high school girlfriend on Super Bowl Sunday.
3. Decorate his old room as a nursery and say "Won't it be great to share your room with your new baby sister?"
2. Secretly sprinkle all the leftovers with Metamucil.
1. Ask him to stay home one evening and say "Dad's been awfully frisky lately and I'm worried about his heart. You don't mind listening in on the old baby monitor, do you?"
Have you got an idea on how to scare a Boomerang Kid out of the house? Leave a Comment!
David & Veronica, GypsyNester.com
Friday, August 8, 2008
Top 10 Ways to Scare Your Boomerang Kid Out of the House
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10 comments:
I don't know how to get rid of boomerang kids. If I did, I would not be telling you this. I have a kicker of a story. When my uncle passed away, we inherited his non-working son who then became homeless. This son of his had not worked since he was 19 years old. This son of my uncle my cousin was 48 years old, living at home, and not paying a dime. He now lives with my dad. I had to MAKE him go to work, but he only pays 250.00 a month. He has no desire to EVER move out. When my 85 year old dad dies then I am stuck with Roy. Roy was an honor student while in high school. Does ANYBODY have a story like this one? Email me at dawnalynn44@yahoo.com if you have any idea what I can do about this mess.
Not that I would exactly recommend this, but when I divorced my daughter's father after 22 years I let him keep the big house. When they boomerang home, they prefer 4 bedrooms and two full baths and 2500 sq. ft. of living space to my two bedroom, 1200 sq ft cottage.
My folks accomplished a similar feat with my then 24 year old brother by moving from the city we lived in 45 miles out to a backwoods country home. My brother wasn't interested in the nightly communte to meet up with his buddies at the bar so he finally got an apartment.
Of course, being a pragmatist, my personal favorite way of scaring the boomerang kis out is to sit down and show them exactly how much they will be required to pay for room and board. No job, no cash? No problem. They can take over my weekly manicures, pedicures and full body (empahsize nude)massage, thus earning the equivalent of about $150 a week.
the MAD Goddess
Too funny!!!!
I'll keep this list in mind if our kids ever move back home. Funny, even though the kids are all married and on their own, the idea that their parents are sexual beings doesn't seem to have occurred to any of them. Talk about denial!!!
This didn't scare him out of the house but it did worry him a little. He went off to college and we moved out of the state--six hundred miles away. We sent our new address to his older brother but forgot to send it to him. He had no way to contact us. He spent his summers at his older brother's house!
After he married, and about the same time that our youngest son joined the army, we moved back to the same area.
We didn't plan it that way, it was just the way things worked out, but it worked.
I like them all - but my favorite would be moving - then they can't come "home" !!! Happened to a buddy of mine when I was was in the Navy - he went home on leave and his parents had sold the house and left no forwarding address !!! He thought his parents had redecorated his old room, and the new owner came downstairs as he was making coffee and asked him what he was doing in his house! I swear it's true!
The boys always accused us of turning off the heat in their rooms. Stop doing their laundry or cooking for them. Up the rent.
They have all moved out and are doing well.
Lol...love the ideas! We found frequent loud sex was the answer for us. Swear to God the kids left tire marks rounding the corner (snicker)!
To first commenter: there's nothing YOU can do about Roy as long as your father is willing to let him freeload. Once your father dies, it's a different story; at that point, you can hand him a bus ticket to somewhere across the country and tell him to pack anything he absolutely can't do without, that this is the last he's getting out of you. Anyone else in the family who complains has just volunteered to let Roy move in with THEM.
I am seriously considering taking a job teaching English to businessmen in Japan. You can contract for a year, you don't necessarily have to speak Japanese, and the kids won't even be able to visit.
Declaring a fast would probably do it.
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